One of the more difficult aspects of caring for a loved one with cancer is the potential impact on you if you work outside the home. While many employers may initially be sympathetic to your need to assist your family member, after a time (and cancer treatment and recovery takes time) this kind attitude may wane somewhat, and you may encounter signs of irritation and resentment from both your supervisor and other employees who may be assigned work you normally would do.

The legal side. If you work for a company that employees 50 or more people, and you have worked for your present employer for at least one year when your loved one becomes ill, you are probably eligible for unpaid leave under the Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA), described above. This allows you an extended amount of time for caregiving, and it need not be taken all at once. Consult with your employer's human resources department for assistance in implementing your leave. Bear in mind that this leave is unpaid — which can make using it difficult for some employees. It may be possible for you to use a combination of your paid leave as well as some unpaid leave to meet your needs.

Unfortunately, for those who work in smaller organizations, legal rights to extended leave are generally not present. However, many companies permit employees who need to provide care to use their other forms of leave — vacation, sick leave, etc. — for caregiving purposes. Again, discuss this with your human resources officer.

A key immediate source of information about your rights and privileges as an employee is your organization's human resources/personnel policies. Read this document before making decisions about your leave needs.

The human side. At the heart of working effectively with your employer about your caregiving situation is good communication. It is very important to be accurate and candid about your situation, and to provide your employer with regular information about the status of your needs for absence from work.

Flexible work schedules can also offer an opportunity for caregivers. Your human resources staff can assist you in learning about what might be possible in your situation. Sometimes a more informal approach to flex time can be arranged through discussion with your supervisor. Other options that might be possible include working part time, or even job sharing.

Finally, if you know that others with whom you work have taken on additional tasks to help you, be sure to thank them regularly for their support and assistance.

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